The Cookbook Junkies

I love my son, unconditionally, wholly and without hesitation….but some days I feel like the bug and not the windshield….

Sometimes it is so hard having an autistic child…and then I get mad at myself when there are children missing, sick, dying, dead….I love him more than anything but sometimes it is so hard. Today he went after a child who walked into the waiting room at the doctor’s office (pediatric psychiatrist)….I had to pull him down the hall away from this poor child. The rest of the time – it was screaming, crying, calling me names….after we saw Dr. H…we were leaving and he went up to this child and started to jump him….life with an autistic child is a crap shoot.

It has been raining for days and I love it. Everyone hates it – but to me – it is calming and renewing. It promotes growth, it cleanses the earth – the world seems fresh during and after a rain. I could live in London or Seattle or any other city that has frequent rains.

I love thunderstorms and wind. I love snow. I love being cozy on the couch watching the snow or rain outside and knowing everyone I love is safe.

I love The Golden Girls. Something about four women living together, not alone, sharing, laughing — I love the episodes when it was raining or a hurricane was “a comin”.

I love my husband and sons. I love our friends, my friends, our family.

Today is the 2nd anniversary of Madeleine McCann being snatched from their vacation apartment in Portugal. I judged them and was harsh when it happened. My heart breaks for them.

I hate children hurting, cancer, disease, sadness, marriages in turmoil, people being mean. I hate “hate”.

I’m having a zen day I suppose.