The Cookbook Junkies

It’s a feeling bad day. Nothing “bad” happening – I just feel exhausted, miserable and overwhelmed. Andrew wants constant attention, Jim went back to work – and I have to make a shitload of stuff for the annual trek to the beach to spend the day in a TINY bungalow with 40 large people and one autistic five year old. It isn’t fun for me or him. Everyone else drinks and could care less as they are all the bosses and me just a lowly outcast. “Don’t put that there.” “What are you doing?” “Do you boil water like that?” Sweet Mother of God, kill me now.

It’s 12 hours – I can suffer through 12 hours. I’ve suffered through worse.

Addendum: The folks aren’t that bad – it’s just really really loud and really really crowded and my Asperger’s kicks in.

I try to do for people – I do because I really like to – I like to make people happy. It’s not some twisted need of mine – it’s not to make people like me – it is HONESTLY because I genuinely like to do things for people. It is hard for people to grasp that concept.

I don’t get or see much of that in return. For example, my neighbor has three children ages 40 to 50 – all computer literate – one works about six hours a day, one is a housewife and another does something but apparently naps at work- she comes to me for help ordering shoes on line because she says they don’t want to do anything for her (one “child” still lives with her). The other day I ordered her a pair of shoes – took me a couple phone calls and a little trouble – but I did it. Last night, her daughter passed me as I walked home in the rain from the train station. I move the car there about five p.m. so that Jim can drive it home as he works late every night and Andrew is asleep and I have no one to sit with him. (She comes home at 5:10 from the train station and lives right across the street — she wasn’t going anywhere but home). You think she would have stopped to ask me if I needed a ride – she didn’t know that my other neighbor was meeting me and giving me a ride – all she knew is that I was walking in the rain without an umbrella toward home. Example of how she could have done something MINOR to help another and she didn’t.

A few weeks ago I casually mentioned to my friend (only made this year while waiting to pick up our kids), Margaret, that next time she goes to Ireland let me know – I would love for them to bring me back some Sheridans (a delicious coffee liqueur that you can only buy in Ireland). I never gave it another thought.

Yesterday Margaret, Danny (her husband) and their youngest son, Michael, come bolting down the hall – Michael running to me “Jenny, Jenny” because I give him some change every day. I did have some MegaBlocks and Thomas cups for him so happens that day – and occasionally I have given them extras of books I find but I don’t do anything out of the ordinary for them.

Margaret hands me a package – it’s a bottle of Sheridans. I was over the moon – I asked “How?” “And how much do I owe you.” She wouldn’t hear of me paying her and then told me Danny’s best friend and his wife DIED this weekend and he had to fly back to Ireland for the funeral. This man with a job, two kids and his best friend passing flew to Ireland on Sunday night and back Wednesday and remembered to stop for a bottle of Sheridans for me – and he hardly knows me – I’ve talked to him a minute or two. NEVER in a thousand years would I have even dreamt that they would remember such a request for a fun trip to Ireland but on such a horrific occasion – they remember to do something nice. I think I got the facts right about the death etc. I was so dumbfounded by all of it – I’m not sure if I remember correctly. There are tears in my eyes for his friends as I type this – and tears for their generosity of spirit.

Thank you Danny and Margaret. God Bless You and may your friends rest in peace in God’s hands. You’ve renewed my faith in humanity.

Well, after the swine flu, we had Jim’s bad test results…we are still working on all that but my heart and gut tells me Jim isn’t going to be proactive and will live (or die) with his 7% chance of NOT getting cancer.

Then my arm got smashed in a door the same day I got stung by a bee. Then our basement got water (from what I thought was a small pipe issue – and turned out to be a major sewer problem) because my 24 year old flushes paper towels down the toilet – $400 for the line cleaning, not to mention the carpet, wall – aggravation!!!! He is going to end up paying for this – either blood or money his choice.

Andrew’s birthday party on Saturday (early because of a conflict) was a huge success and he and Jim went to their first Mets game together in the rain but they still had fun – until Andrew called me crying hysterically when they got to the car – “I want to see you mama..” broke my heart. He is having a Jewish birthday this year – started on the 20th and will go through the 29th (his actual birthday).

A relative disappointed me hugely and this time I’m done. I went out of my way to be nice to her – and she screwed me twice that I am aware of. It’s no wonder she goes through friends like tissue and is always fighting with someone because someone once again has done HER wrong. Grow up.

My sister was shipping us a German shepherd puppy in a few weeks but I think we’re postponing for a while – too much going on. We’re debating over Andrew’s medication and there is so much up in the air – it will all come crashing down again.

Rest in peace, Aunt Gladys – she passed away on Sunday – Jim’s last living aunt (I think).

Here is hoping July will be better.