I have multiple personalities and none of them like you.

I’ve been sad lately. Andrew has been so full of anxiety, so much flapping, and running in circles. Every time I speak to his psychologist or teacher at school – I get even more depressed. They all say he will be okay – but it is hard now.

My husband, a good man, says things like “how do we put up with this for the next ___ years” – and it breaks my heart – “put up with”? How dare he say that? Madeleine McCann’s parents would give their kidneys to put up with Madeleine for even one more day. Dear God, I can barely function with all of this. I know it sounds as if I’m a wimp – but I’m not – I fight like a dog for my son. I’m his mother, coach, teacher, protector, and lawyer – even defending him to his own father but God I’m tired. I’ll rest when I’m dead.

Friday the 9th, Andrew has surgery. We had the blood work and the pre-op and that was stressful enough. Andrew has a total nervous breakdown anytime we go near a doctor’s office. Extreme anxiety. Friday will be bad getting him to the hospital and inside. It is just an adenoidectomy for Christ’s sake – but for Andrew – it might as well be sending him to the electric chair. He will be a mess and I will be a rock while my heart breaks for him again.